Dear ............,
Its ok. I understand what you must be going through and must also be pondering. Likewise I also. I'm not sure if you will like me very much after reading this email.
There are no questions that have or will offend me. Questions are meant to be asked. If you don't ask how will you ever know the truth. Which person does not want to love and be love?
1-really we all know that the past is bitter and many of us have been hurt, I will love to know what did the past thought you and the experiences you have gotten so far?
The past taught me that I must love myself first if I want to take care of others PROPERLY. I seek strength in God and that God has given me many chances and helped me this far.
In 2004, I wanted to off myself because of love. I sacrifice and gave my all. I could not take it. So I overdose and wanted to drown. Well, I thought I did. But was swept by the waves and was saved by some workers. A few months after that I met the Princess of my life. My BF's daughter. We became close and she was and IS my other saviour in my life besides God. … among others.
2-when did you received Jesus Christ into your life?
Never; despite of the fact that I grew up in a convent all my life. I am born in a Muslim family. However, after having said that …. I never believed in God till so late as there is way to many miracles that have happened in the course of my life that one cannot just ignore.
I do believe in Jesus Christ as a saviour and a prophet.
How was the experience?
The experience was wonderful it was as though there was light at the end of the tunnel. It was like an out of body experience.
And after some day what happen to you?
After some months close to years. I thought I found God and myself. I guess its human nature and my own weakness that I should fall AGAIN. Its like the more faith I have the more test I had to take. The enduring pain was nearly too much again. This relationship of mine … is close to 5 years plus. …… (I think I don't want to get into this discussion till further) ….
3-how is your home like?
Its simple but just got complicated. Now I toggle between MY BIOLOGIGAL and ADOPTED family. We are a close-knit family of 4 girls. Me being the oldest am not married and to the disappointment of some (but they understand that it is my choice).
Both my brother-in-laws are of British descendents. My second sis and my youngest are already married and have children of their own and are working in Singapore. Except for my second sis who is a happy homemaker. My third sis is working in Shangai with her BF Simon.
My parents were divorce a long time ago. I now stay with my mum, as she is alone. But I toggle between her and my God daughter. We make an effort to meet every weekend and would strive to help one another where we can.
Compare to Christian life style?
Sorry I cannot compare for I do not know the life style of a Christian. I've stayed with a Catholic family before like during school holidays. He is my childhood friend. His parents and mine are close friends.
For my observation there are no different. His family is kind and we always care for each other out of sincerity. We say grace every time before we eat just like us.
4-what give you courage that you can make it in your next relationship?
That God is great and God is kind. God has shown me that not all mankind are equal nor are all man cruel. So it is up to me to find strength in God to discover THAT LOVE in another man AGAIN.
5-what are the potentialities you released in your past relationship and what are the new ones you are coming out with now, or is it the same way that you managed your past or you have another style of managing the home this time?
I do not know what you mean by potential but I will not want to change anything. It is just me and the way I care and love for another human being that my own family and those that I know lack that comprehension. .... even me.
For me once I love that person I will care and give my all for that person. Like what I did with Jazzmann. I gave my all …. I sacrificed, I bled, I toiled, and I shed …. Yet … does he care?? That answer only God knows.
My God daughter always tells me that she does not want to see me hurt. Wants to see me happy. She a 17 year old to tell me that God will show me a better person than her dad!!
6-have you ever gone through Proverbs 31: 10-31 and what did you understood from that chapter,
Yes, I have and to me .........
The term "virtuous" is from a noun meaning strength, efficiency, and ability. Here it refers to strength of character as well as moral strength and firmness.
I understood that when a woman has strength of character (fears God, loves truth, hates sin), then others would take note and recognize this. It will be very obvious because it is so unusual. People are so morally weak and so anemic in character, that when a man or woman of strength shows up it is quite evident to all.
And are you sure with time you can begun like that same woman (his grace is abundant,
Sure you ask. Are we EVER sure of our future?? No. To me I can only plan and do the best that I can to serve. If there are any obstacles we can go through it one at a time. To me love can conquer ANYTHING. But it is US man who proposes and it is God that disposes.
7-what is your reason to marry again?
To be happy again. Not to be lonely. To share EVERYTHING and to give EVERYTHING.
And will they be happy seeing you with another man who is not there father?
They will be happy IF I AM happy same as my Goddaughter's opinion. I am not married so I do not have any children. To me the "THEY" is referred to as my immediate family
8-tell me about them if you have any?
THEM – my parents are divorced a long time ago. I live with my mum she is diabetic. But ok.
My dad remarried and I love my step-mum. They are rarely here as most of the time they are in Malaysia.
My 2nd sis is married and has 2 beautiful kids. She is a homemaker while her hubby works.
My 3rd sis is working in Shangai with her BF and I only see her when she comes down.
My youngest sis is working and she travels allot because of her work. Her husband is also working. They have a maid and 2 beautiful kids.
My God daughter she is 17 years old has been great. Her mum is rarely here. I love her with all my heart and would sacrifice my own life just to protect her even though she is not of my blood.
9-are you thinking one day to get married?
That is my dream one day. Come true or not I do not know. But there is no harm in dreaming about it. After all life is walking on a thread between fear and hope. .... for one cannot survive without the other.
And be loved by some one who you have not seen before?
Yes. Fate is in God's hands not mine. It is not how long you know the person BUT it is how well you know the person. Anything can happen …… provided 2 people are willing to go through life together.
Through thick and thin, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, no matter what storm may come in one's way. Yes, is the answer. Only if the other party sees the way I do and am willing to share interests with each other.
10- what are your faults? And best side as a woman in your home? Society?
I am cheerful, optimistic, and always look on the bright side. I am adventurous, and have a lively interest in anything with an element of risk. I don't mind trying anything once. My friends know me as totally frank, and will always give an honest opinion. THEY PROBABLY SOMETIMES AVOID ME BECAUSE OF THIS.
However, I have a happy-go-lucky nature makes me a cheerful companion, and I seldom let anything depress you for long. I have a good memory for detail, but may be very forgetful in other ways, often mislaying my possessions. I am impulsive, and concentrate on the matters of today, rather than worrying about the future.
And morale world? –
Not quite sure what you mean by this. But my rule of the thumb is never treating others the way you do not want others to treat you. Revenge is not in my blood. I never believe that a person can always turn into a new leave. I am not one who believes that once a thief always a thief.
11-what church did you attend?
None.
And what is your commitment to GOD work?
I may not be a person that prays 5 times a day as required by my religion. But what works for me is that I never forget God and that I must never forget to communicate with him daily, as it is in him that I seek my strength. I am ever so grateful for all the kindness he has shown me and has helped me throughout the course of my life.
12-what are your favorites in foods,
None and all. I love all kinds of food and cuisine. I would try anything once and if I don't like it I shall not eat it again. Except pork and meat that are not slaughtered by Muslim rites.
funs
Love all the romanticism that life can offer.
Experiment in cooking.
Walking along the beach and watch the sun sets.
Swimming for leisure.
Enjoy watching movies. I love historical movies, war movies, and science fiction. My favourite super hero is Batman. I am looking forward to watching Spiderman 3 and Pirates of the Caribbean.
and profession?
I am a teacher by profession and this is my primary passion. I love to teach and share my knowledge to whoever may hunger for it. I teach English and Math for children from ages 4 till 12 years old. But in the daytime I have a permanent job.
13-what did this what mean to you when a man voices this word? I LOVE YOU.
When a guy says this to me it means that he is willing to share EVERYTHING and give EVERYTHING and commit himself and be entwined with my life.
How do you feel about this word?
If I love this guy and know that he is my true love I am willing to share EVERYTHING and give EVERYTHING and commit myself and be entwined with his life.
14- how safe will this relationship be in your hands,
I am not one to give up. In my past relations I am always the one who is forever trying to save it. I often apologises for things I didn't even do. But apologise anyway. Just so to keep the peace.
"How safe?" You ask?? As safe as protecting a baby in my arms. I can only do the best that I can do, be and provide. As long, as my better half loves me true and would likewise do his best to protect me. I will to.
will you love more than before or you will be reserved?
Perhaps in the beginning I will be reserved to observe and watch to see if my "other half" is everything he says he is on paper; for action speaks louder than words.
I will learn to love him more as each day passes ONCE he has proven to me everything he says he is.
15-on which standard will want the new home to be built (background or foundation)?
Built on our love, our toil, our blood, our tears and guided by God for there are no foundation stronger than that THAT is built with one's own hands. God will not help us if we don't help ourselves. God will not give if we don't seek.
Please forgive if I hurt you with any question
Nothing to forgive nor have you hurt me in anyway by your questions.
(working on it)
